What if, in the New Year of 2015, you could be naughty?
It could be just a little bit naughty…just enough that you could have a quiet chuckle to yourself at your hidden secret. Or maybe a lot naughty, because you’ve done something you never thought you’d have the courage to do and which will make a major difference to your life.
Sounds a lot more interesting than the term a ‘New Year Resolution’, doesn’t it?
Like Fluffy, I have an issue with the term and concept of ‘New Year Resolutions’. (See Fluffy’s post on Life Resolutions – #3 Be Present.) Why wait until the New Year to make improvements? Start now. Start hard. And if you fall…you aren’t breaking a ‘Resolution’…a promise you made to yourself. You just try again. It’s only a failure if you don’t keep trying.
Most of our New Year Resolutions just roll on from year to year. I know mine did. Learn more. Lose weight. Manage finances better. Blah blah. I don’t think they should be called ‘New Year Resolutions’, instead they should be called ‘Not Yet Resolved’. Because that’s generally what New Year Resolutions are…the things in our lives we are unhappy with, but think we need a magical annual reminder to ‘fix’ ourselves when generally we aren’t actually broken. Just human.
So…what if we made 2015 a little fun?
For example, this year I want to make time to read more. I’m spending too much time at night by the glow of transmitting and receiving devices and not enough time reading to expand my mind beyond nappies and grocery lists. And I miss that growth. I know I’ll never have the time to read the 3-5 books a week like I used to. And I’m not going to set a ‘number’ of books that I should be able to read over a period of time…that’s writing myself a recipe for failure. But I want to read more…just more…and spend less time at night bathing in the draining glow of electronics.
This is something I want to do…rather than the mentality of I ‘have’ to do it because it’s a New Year Resolution. In some ways it is me being selfish, I want to learn again. But after every few books, I’m going to do this…I’m going to buy a raunchy novel. One written for women, generally by women, where the female lead is empowered and sexy (rather than some diminutive little mouse who is coaxed out of her hole by a rich and strong alpha male who underneath it all is still an arsehole). Disney isn’t the only company responsible for writing a lot of unrealistic ‘happy ever after’ scripts.
When I was studying, after my exams I’d mainline Mills and Boon-type books to empty my mind. It was my ‘academic purge’ if you will. I’d get sick of them quite quickly though…so I started to go towards the raunchier versions and then I found Black Lace novels. (Go read one. And be warned most of them make Fifty Shades of Grey look…well…very washed out by comparison.) The only reason I stopped reading the Black Lace novels was because the men I was in a relationship with really hated me reading them. I think they were a tad emasculated about the concept of their girlfriend reading a raunchy novel…or maybe it was the fact I didn’t need pictures to imagine the vivid and explicit descriptions. My first husband would just make the books ‘disappear’. At any rate…it did become a good barometer to determine whether a boyfriend was going to have a long term future with me. Fortunately my last boyfriend-now husband has no such problems with them.
But when I pick up my first Black Lace novel in almost two decades, I think I may get the giggles. The ‘heroines’ in these books seldom are in their 40s, trying to juggle work, motherhood and friendships. The poor women are merely trying to juggle their daily life with All. That. Sex. Oh the poor dears. My heart bleeds for you. Really. I’ll let you know how I go reading them now as a mother in a future post. Who knows, maybe I’ll try to write one. While wearing sexy lingerie. Which leads to my next New Year Naughty…
From 2011-2014 my overall goal was to lose my baby weight. This year I saw pictures of myself at my 40th…and mortified I refused to carry those extra kilos into another year. I wasn’t considered overweight…but I was at my heaviest and my back was so sore I knew the only way to alleviate the pain was to literally take some pressure off my spine. I watched my other Mummy friends succumb to the promised land of miracle shakes and cleanses, where low calorie meals were delivered conveniently to your door and online work out programs designed ‘just for you’ popped up in your email promising to make you a Yummy Mummy in 12 weeks. And all of them cost money. A lot of it. And that was not what I had a lot of on maternity leave.
So, on the recommendation of a friend who had visually ‘bounced back’ (hint-you don’t ‘bounce’ back after having a baby-ever…you are so sleep deprived you crawl) after twins I downloaded a calorie monitoring app (www.calorieking.com.au) and then spent every day ranting at it as my ‘healthy’ food showed the amount of sugar I was actually eating to compensate for the lack of taste when all of the fat had been removed from food. I watched the kilograms slowly…oh so slowly God damn it…drop away. My friends on the miracle cures lost it quickly. Put it back on. Lost it again. Repeat. All the while Yummy Mummy Valhalla stayed further from their reach, my weight stayed off because the program taught me I needed to make some lifestyle changes which you won’t find in liquid form.
And today I treated myself to something naughty as part of reaching this goal. For the first time in years…over a decade in fact… I bought some sexy underwear. ‘Matchings’ even….beyond my standard beige t-shirt bras and Big W cotton undies in a packet of ten. My new lingerie is very comfortable, but certinaly not sensible. I’ve ignored the impending post Christmas bills, and reacquainted myself with satin and lace. It felt irresponsible and reckless-damn it felt good.
Of course the expenditure is in direct contrast of my aim to be more fiscally responsible. So I’ve started by collating information – where is the money going and why. Yes, I am once again keeping a budget…dear God help me…and I started it before Christmas. As a result…the statistics are somewhat skewed in the ‘groceries’ and ‘gifts’ categories…but it does give me an indication of what is happening in my monetary black hole. Yes, it’s dry and depressing, but my first goal is to save enough to have a romantic night in the city with my husband in a five star hotel. Wearing my irresponsible lingerie. I’m hoping I won’t have the time or inclination to read a book of any sort. It’s really the only way I can think of to make figures sexy (the numerical sort) …the reward at the end. Like everything…it’s all a matter of perspective.
I’ll let you know when I reach my goal. But you won’t get any details of the night itself…sorry.
So these are my New Year Naughties. I concede, to some they may still sound a like Resolutions. But that’s not how I’m viewing them. These are goals I have been aiming for and working towards for a while, unrelated to whether if it is the last day of the year, or the first. I’m just giving myself permission to make the goals a little…sexier. Because let’s face it, that makes things A LOT more interesting.
So go on. Make your 2015 fun. Make it a little bit naughty.