Comment on The Spirit of Christmas by Kezunprepared.
Oh, I really feel this. My husband and I have always been in the middle of our two families. Everyone wants to see us and it gets stressful. We’re the only ones who have to run around from place to place each Christmas Day, usually (other siblings are either single or have inlaws far away). The last 5 years have all been under the shadow of the death of my brother in law. Family fights, the general feeling of loss, the over compensating some years, and completely bad behaviour others. It’s been rough.
People forgetting their spirit. Trying to micromanage each other. Forgetting that it’s about giving more than receiving. I admit I was feeling pretty over it (and I am someone who really loves Christmas normally).
Luckily everyone seems to have calmed down this year. We are only seeing one family at a time (one on Xmas day and one on Boxing day). The inlaws seem to have relaxed somewhat. I have coped the last couple of years by turning to charity and the act of giving to those who I know will actually be grateful. It’s immensely healing.
It will be good to get back to basics. I hope you have a very merry Christmas – whatever that means to you xx
Recent Comments by Kezunprepared
Just. Get. Off Me.
I hear you. Sounds like you’ve had a rough trot! I’d be bat shit crazy by now. In fact, I’ve been beginning to feel it and I haven’t had half the shit you’ve had to deal with! I’m at that point (I can always feel it’s about to tip over into insane lady territory) where I know I need to find SOME WAY to be alone or child free for a bit. To do something just for me. I love my kid like crazy and by no means is he a bad or difficult kid (he could be much worse) but he’s full on and it’s relentless!! I sometimes have to stop myself from snapping at him for just being a kid. I do look forward to him going back to school. I want to get my hair did and go to work!
#itsinthebag this Christmas
I love this initiative so much. I don’t think I have a handbag to fill this year, but I have resolved that I will drop off sanitary items at a drop off centre (they have a box for it at the local swimming centre and I will be there a lot over the school holidays) and will participate for next Christmas.
I have so much empathy for what you went through and for what these women have been through. Having once been on the receiving end of verbal and emotional abuse (always worse when drinking was involved), I feel so fortunate to be in a good place with a good man. I really want to give back more. DV is never as simple as those fortunate enough to not experience it think.
To hashtag or not…
Some very good fuel for thought. I have been ‘hash tagging’ less lately. The ‘thoughts and prayers’ only go so far. I’ll comment if something feels like it needs to be said, but I definitely think carefully before joining the chorus of hashtaggers. It can be comforting when you see solidarity for a cause around the world, but it can also be a device that makes everything (even tragedy) a marketing tool or a troll magnet. Yuck.
You’ve Been Tindered
Interesting. I was going to let you know that one of my best friends found love on Tinder but then I realised the only reason they met up was because I showed up as a mutual Facebook friend! So technically, it wasn’t Tinder that did it. It was just a digital way of meeting through a friend as my bestie said she’d never have gone to meet him if I hadn’t told her more about him and assured her he was meetable.
I wonder how many ‘we met on Tinder’ stories are more like my friend’s than the app being magical.
Yes – the competition is silly. I am a parent and while sometimes I might be guilty of (internally) rolling my eyes when a child free adult talks about being soooooo tired from all their social events they’ve been attending lately, I make a big effort to never be smug about knowing what lack of sleep is, just because I’m a parent. Who wins that competition, anyway? I remember being fucking exhausted while I was studying, while I was working full time, when I was a freakin’ kid with no responsibility except to graduate high school. Some people simply suffer from insomnia thanks to anxiety or other conditions. We are all tired adults with responsibilities! We all should be able to whinge about it!
Empathy is good! x